Read Caregiver employees bring unique value to companies (HBR) YES! If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a hundred times: parenting is a leadership asset. Researchers surveyed over 130 employees who also engaged in caregiving activities (either childcare, elder care, caring for someone with a disability, or caring for someone with a long-term illness) about how this unpaid care work impacted their skills in the paid workforce. They coded the responses into three categories: humanity, productivity, and something they called “cognitivity” (which they define as the “invisible work critical to running [an operation]”. Below is a summary of the top skills:
On learning: I was gone last night -- did not see my kids except over breakfast -- taking a one-time class at our grocery co-op on how to make kombucha 😂 I do this often -- take classes, some of which are genuine continuing ed and last weeks -- because I'm invested in my own lifelong learning, and because I want to model that for my kids. Once one of my daughters asked me, "Why do you take classes and have dinner with your friends all the time?" And I said, "Because being an adult is awesome." And I meant it. I want them to see that being an adult is about so much more than work and even family -- that learning and having fun and maybe most importantly, having a life outside of being a wife and mother is imperative and worth carving out time for. It doesn't make me *less* of a wife and mother -- it makes me a better wife and mother because it makes me *more* me.
Oof. This hit hard. I took my kids to get their nails done before the first day of school and they give adults a little shoulder massage while your nails are drying. My son asked why grown-ups got massages and not kids and, without really thinking, I replied "because being a grown-up is hard". I immediately was like "yikes, why did I say that?" Your comment really made me think about the messages I'm (unintentionally) sending. Appreciate that, friend.
On learning: I was gone last night -- did not see my kids except over breakfast -- taking a one-time class at our grocery co-op on how to make kombucha 😂 I do this often -- take classes, some of which are genuine continuing ed and last weeks -- because I'm invested in my own lifelong learning, and because I want to model that for my kids. Once one of my daughters asked me, "Why do you take classes and have dinner with your friends all the time?" And I said, "Because being an adult is awesome." And I meant it. I want them to see that being an adult is about so much more than work and even family -- that learning and having fun and maybe most importantly, having a life outside of being a wife and mother is imperative and worth carving out time for. It doesn't make me *less* of a wife and mother -- it makes me a better wife and mother because it makes me *more* me.
Oof. This hit hard. I took my kids to get their nails done before the first day of school and they give adults a little shoulder massage while your nails are drying. My son asked why grown-ups got massages and not kids and, without really thinking, I replied "because being a grown-up is hard". I immediately was like "yikes, why did I say that?" Your comment really made me think about the messages I'm (unintentionally) sending. Appreciate that, friend.
Give yourself some grace. I have definitely said "PARENTING is hard" more than once 😂
I love these posts and the article about skills from unpaid caregiving was particularly encouraging for me :) Thanks for sharing!
It's so important and, all too sadly, often under-recognized.
I modeled a learning mindset by burning a new to me type of pancake. Showed the kids that I can still by a beginner and make mistakes